Letters to Political Parties

Dear ANC,

I expected much, but there was a lot of hot air (mostly from Julius) and you ended up without winning Cape Town. You huff and puff and nothing happens, so what is one to think of you? And have you noticed that you have lost quite a bit of support across the country? That’s what happens when people start seeing that you are not doing anything for them and so look elsewhere for services.

Try and deliver the services promised. That’s what usually can convince people to vote for you. Try it and see.



Dear DA,

Well done. You did great. But now can you deliver? Really? Or are you going to find more toilets that are not enclosed to try to distract people from the issues? Anyway, to get more votes, try delivering. You might actually retain Cape Town with a bigger majority next time, especially when the ANC has Julius trying to push you around.

This is your chance to prove you can deliver. Otherwise you will not be able to convince many to vote for you again. Or you might just find yourself in Cape Town only, again. Maybe with Midvaal. Try it, you’ll see how great it works for you. Or else you will lose votes even to the Cape Party. Now THAT would be embarrassing.



Dear Cape Party,

Can’t see you anywhere on the voting landscape. At all. Tried everywhere. Or maybe all those black people you ignored in your manifesto just took their votes elsewhere, mainly because they thought you were racist in your approach. Anyway, curious question, who is the coloured lady on your posters? No one seems to know her name. But we do know the two white guys. So why didn’t she get a prominent feature on your website or manifesto? Curious.

See you next time



Keep going. You will make it. One day.



Dear IFP

Sorry guys, the NFP took your votes, the ANC took your votes, even the DA took your votes. Hope you are still around in the next elections.



Surprise, surprise!! Welcome (somewhat) back to the land of the political landscape. Hope to see a better showing next time. Try to convince people that the leadership squabble is not really that big. In fact, get a new leader. It will work out best for you. It really will.

Keep Coping!


Dear Newly Formed Community Parties (that actually got votes and won wards)

Well Done. Don’t be like the big parties and lose your focus. Otherwise, you place in the sun will be VERY short lived.

Enjoy the party (pun intended)


Dear every other party

…………….yah. Better luck next time………………


One thought on “Letters to Political Parties

  • May 21, 2011 at 10:00 am

    Not only do I read all the articles but in fact look forward to Saturday mornings when I receive the latest batch … always find the articles thought provoking, sometimes a bit of tongue in cheek (I like, I like)  but this one in particular …. simply love it. 


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